So, my dad is in the hospital. He has an MRSA Staph infection. He's been in the hospital since Friday, and as far as I can tell the infection only seems to be getting worse. The strain of staph he has is incredibly hard to treat because it adapts to the antibiotics. It's so hard to see my dad in so much pain. He puts on a brave face until he can't. It's scary to see him when he's so sick, since he's always been a pretty tough guy. I've never seen him like this and I am so worried about him. We will be fasting for him tomorrow, and he's had a priesthood blessing. I just need to work on having faith that he will be healed. I know he will be healed actually, I just am worried about how long it will take.
Needless to say, I've had a very hard time sleeping these last few days. I'm running on empty. I'm so stressed out about my dad and getting no support from my boss at work. He doesn't care that I'm at the breaking point: either about to pass out from lack of sleep or burst into tears because I'm worried about my dad. He didn't even ask how my dad or I was doing. He just let me know all the things I did wrong today. I'm not surprised, that's his MO, but I was hoping he'd let up on me for a few days since he knows how much I have on my plate right now. I'd give anything to be able to quit right this second, but I can't afford to go without a job.
On the plus side, I went to institute last week for the first time this semester (it was the first class of the summer session), and I plan to continue if I can figure out where it will be held. I made a new friend. I think I have the words "recently divorced" posted on my head because he figured out my dirty little secret within two seconds of our conversation. He was still nice to me though afterwards, so it wasn't so bad. It was weird but nice to talk to someone new. I really like the institute teacher, Brother Boyce. He's clever and funny, and I can tell he really means it when he says he loves this gospel. I am excited to study and learn from him.
I have decided to try to move to Utah when I can find a job and a place to live. And I can afford the move. Which if I wait until I can afford the move, I'll never get to go, so I'm just really waiting until I have a job and a place to live. I figure if I am meant to go, the rest will work out.
1 comment:
I am sorry about your boss. Nothing is worse than having to go to work each day dreading what is on the other side of the door when you get there.
You are in a unique position in life right now. I know you have a lot of heavy decisions to make but follow your instincts, you will be blessed by taking leaps of faith.
Marilyn, you deserve such happiness, you deserve to have your desires fulfilled. This is your time, only you can know what is right for you, just go with your gut, don't question life too much.
If you decide to make the move, just pack what you can in your car, leave the rest behind, it is just stuff...do what you need to do for you!
Love you,
Aunt Mar~
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